"Diary of Jaime"

Hi everyone! I just had yummy chicken on the grill! That's right! We had a cook-out and I am super happy and satisfied about this... I've missed the taste of chicken on a grill! Aww.

So. I was listening to that song, Diary of Jane, right? Hehe. And, it got me thinking about my diary.

I dug it out from under my bed, where it last was. Started reading my last entries from June and July from 2010. Apparently I started suspecting Mike of things early on! I had no recollection of this at all, imagine that? I wadfn

nosd

no.

Sorrr

stop

Sorry! Ahem. I was reading about how I didn't believe anything he told me, I suspected him of doing a lot of things, and I had no idea why he was with me, when all he did was criticize my job, my weight, my family, and everything important to me.

So interesting to go back and re-live what my emotions were. It made me so sad that I was apparently so distraught over our relationship although I did nothing at that time toesnstos

no

so

sorry

I did nothing at the time. I just let it stir for a few months until one fine day in December I made the choice to follow him to work knowing full-well that I was ending the relationship.

Diaries are amazing things and I've learned a lot from reading it today. I should have acted a lot sooner on my suspicions. Instead I just wrote about them! Silly Jaime!

I promise to never do that again. If I am feeling something I will act on it rather than write it in my diary.

Well. That song by Breaking Benjamin always reminded me of Mike when we were together. I find it interesting that all the songs that remind me of him were songs that weren't happy... they were songs about people's lives after the fact. Interesting. Foreshadowing in my life, at its best! Well. At least Mike had a place in my diary. Wasn't good, but nonetheless, he was in it.

I also started re-arranging my room and came across so many things from his and my relationship. All in the garbage and it felt so good! My brother came across his stupid eye of truth thing and started digging it out of the garbage! Hehe.

Can't believe I still had that stuff. It was buried. Then! While my brother was helping me move my entertainment center, he asked 'why do you have wood in your room?'

No idea what he was talking about, until I saw a piece of wood with "I love you Mush" on it and I got mad. He made me that at camp one time. It was at Delta Lake. Me and my photographic memory. Ahhhh. Back in the day when I thought I had fisouns

sorrr

sorry

Back in the day when I thought I was happiest camping and sitting by a fire. Pshhhhht.

But! Today must have been the cleansing day, right? I did not mean to come across all this stuff that I had left buried in my room!

I am playing Ocarina of Time and I am in Jabu-Jabu's belly! Super scared. I hate this place.

I have to go finish it! Wish me luck!

Love always,

Jaime Lee

Little Relapser